NEW AGE RELATIONSHIPS···
I still had my eyes clogged when I heard someone knocking on my door. It was the second time that my door was knocked in the wee hours of the morning. The first being the day when my little daughter dialed 911 by mistake which alerted Boston police to action. Though their visit perturbed me initially but later on I felt embarrassed and couldn't stop laughing.
Hearing the knock, I peeped through the roadside window and also looked through the eyepiece on my front door to find my neighbor standing there. I opened the door and welcomed her after exchanging my formal smile. She told me, “I have shifted to a single bed room on the 3rd floor of this building“. We both were on the second floor and she had a family of four, her husband and her twins. I was confused whether I've heard her correctly as I was still half asleep. So I asked her again, “why single bed room“. She again replied unexpectedly, “I want to be with myself for sometime“. While I was trying to derive the meaning of what she meant, I couldn't stop myself from asking her the need to do so. This time she almost had tears in her eyes. She said with choked throat, “He has left us“. I was taken aback. All these years I was having an impression that theirs was a happy family. This left me speechless with numerous questions arising in my mind. But then I wanted to give her space and avoided asking her questions further.
I was upset all day long. The mere thought of the disintegration of that family gave me cold feet. Theirs was a home full of life and happiness. The American lady had decorated her house aesthetically and was able to keep a good balance between her family and work. Soon we became familiar to them as we used to meet them often at the play area. My kids were fond of her twin daughter's. Once, when her mother had come from to help her, she accompanied her grandchildren to our place. She had deep grievances for her daughters separation. As we got to taking, she opened up, telling me the whole story leading to their separation. Her daughter's husband had fallen in love with his cell phones, internet, TV for past few months. She also told me that this guy had stopped paying attention to the children and to his wife because of this extramarital affair. He was always busy with the phone calls. He hardly had any time to help in household chores. Her daughter was overloaded with the work of the job and the children. It reminded me of the same story I had heard couple of years back from another American women sitting next to me in one of a long flights from California to Boston. She was divorcee. She told me the reason of her separation as a sexless life after her marriage. She had mentioned that her husband was always on his laptop for official work till late night. He used to be in deep sleep while retiring on the bed with his intolerable snoring all night long. She had many sleepless nights before she divorced him.
I came out from the flash back, and found that these problems are faced by many couples, including my friends from India. Though, none of us divorced so far as but am not sure about the future
One side we are getting closer in far distance relationships because of the cell phone and other web enabled services, but then on the other side we hardly get time for our immediate family. We are brushed up with the latest around the world on a minute to minute basis but then we are most of the times unaware of the developments in the lives of our near dear ones.
Victim of these media are endless. One weekend, one of my close friends, recently married, was supposed to go to a movie. When contacted later, she took in a deep breath and said that half of the movie she watched alone as her husband had been outside on the phone with his boss and rest half ····silent. After reaching home silence broke off into a good fight.
How children could be left behind. Generally I am unable to talk uninterruptedly to my husband after he is back from work. Most of the time, it is so hard to converse with my husband with my 6 year old son interrupting us constantly. The other day we got speak with each other for a good amount of time and then it triggered to me as to how could this be possible···· At that very moment, it made me look for my son who was hiding in a walk-in closet and busy playing game on my husband's mobile. I was shocked to notice his indifference towards his dad's returning home; rather he wanted him home to play on his mobile. Where will be the bonding between them?
It's not all about others. I know how much I enjoy working on my laptop. Sometimes my children keep waiting helplessly for me to play with them but I find internet more interesting then playing with them. Sometime I put them to watch TV if they are too demanding. I remember my childhood how much time my mother had to play with us inspite of she was on full time job.
Recently, I was reading an article about ·silence·. It mentioned that we should take a break, just for a day, from the phone, Internet TV etc. I tried on this suggestion. I realized that I was addicted to many things. I was tempted off and on to check the scraps on my Facebook or call up one or another person. It was such a peaceful day and I had plenty of time to play with my children. I found harmony within me. I could relate this day to be similar to fasting days in many cultures around the world. In the fasting days one need to sacrifice certain foods during this day or can just eat some specific foods. I think we all need to practice the fasting of electronic gadgets at least once a month to keep ourselves and the family happy :-)